Joy overflowing!

Praise God, I was able to come home to my family yesterday, after 5.5 weeks in the hospital!

Better yet, we were able to bring Liam home with us yesterday and didn't have to leave him behind in the NICU when I was discharged. This is a tremendous answer to prayer and quite a surprise to Liam's siblings when they saw he was in the car seat in daddy's arms after I walked in the door. What a joyous reunion!











These are all the pics I have so far this morning. It was a bit of a rough night. Have to understand that yesterday, at 4 days old, was the longest time we have had Liam with us. We are still getting to know each other. He is doing really well, and has even nursed at every feeding, better and better, another wonder after he hasn't nursed before this, being in the NICU. My milk is coming in, though a little slowly... another praise!

Just for clarification, Liam is still breathing faster than he should, but I convinced his doctor yesterday that if that was the only reason for him to stay in the NICU, it wasn't a very good reason (Okay, I didn't say it like that, but you get the idea). His oxygen sats are great and he isn't working or struggling to breath, so as long as he passed his car seat test yesterday and would eat well (from a bottle) and see's our pediatrician on Friday, the doctor agreed to let him go home with us. Woo hoo!

I cannot tell you how wonderful not leaving him behind is/was! I finally feel like a new mama and able to start enjoying getting to know my new baby.

I am also overjoyed to be home with my other children and husband. It is like coming awake after a long nightmare. Praise be to God for bringing us through this very hard time and bringing us all back together again! Thank you all for your many prayers on our behalf! God has surely heard all our prayers (and my many tears) and moved on our behalf!

34 weeks

Hi everyone! Praise the Lord, baby and I have made it to 34 weeks. Today was day 16 in the hospital and things are nice and "calm".

A BIG thank you to those of you who live locally and have come out to visit me in the hospital. It always brightens my day to have visitors! And, helps that day go by faster. I know this hospital is way out of the way for most of you and that makes your visit all the more dear to me. And, those of you who bring me Starbucks, well, those are some yummy days for me to say the least. Hospital coffee is NOT a Starbucks white chocolate mocha, that is for sure!

Thanks also to those of you who have helped out making freezer meals, helping out with the children, and taking the kids to your house for a play day. All these ways of helping us blesses us so much and is helping to make this time I have been on bed rest and this extended time in the hospital bearable for the whole family.

One last thank you to those of you who have sent gifts for the baby from our registry, sent cards, sent or brought flowers to me, etc. I feel so encouraged and blessed by your gifts of love and helping us be ready for this little boys arrival!

Here is the latest news as of today, Tuesday. If things stay "calm" and there are no more bad bleeds, they will do an amnio on the 20th, the day I am 36 weeks gestation, to check on the baby's lungs. If they are deemed healthy/mature, they will deliver him by c-section on the 21st.

Plans can change in the blink of an eye, but this is what the plan is today. I believe most of the high risk doctors are on board with this plan, so that is good. There had been some talk of doing an amnio next week, but we have all talked about it and decided that giving the baby an extra week will give the baby a better chance of having his lungs ready and more developed over all.

Please continue to pray for baby and I here in the hospital. And, for David and the children at home. We now have web cams set up so I can see and talk to the children every day, which is really nice!

Lord willing, baby Liam will be born two weeks from today!

Hospital Bed Rest ~ Day 10

The high risk OB who did rounds today (there is a different doctor every day which is frustrating), came in and actually said I should probably stay here till the baby is born. I told him he is the FIRST of all the docs to say this (the other keep giving me a vague amount of days till I can go home). He seems very practical minded and was all "it just makes sense" for numerous reasons. I said PLEASE write this in my chart because tomorrow will be another doctor and they all seem to think something else! He agreed, both to write it up and about how the different doctors have different approaches. He said that maybe what we would do is when I reach 35 weeks (that is 12 days from now) if my blood levels are where they should be (today's hematocrit was 28 point something... up from 26 point something last week, so it is slowly improving... they want is at a min. of 30 before a c-section) they would do an amnio to check on lung maturity and if it was good they could go ahead and do the c-section at that point.

Well, I have to say that was encouraging to hubby and me. Stay here about 2 more weeks and deliver the baby who will be 35 weeks and should be able to come home with me. This OB today was so practical, which I can really relate to, about how the longer I go the more risk I have of more bleeding and I am already a high risk to lose a lot of blood during the c-section, so the risks start to outweigh keeping the baby in a few extra weeks. What an answer to prayer today and addresses both mine and David's concerns!

We continue to appreciate your prayers for an uneventful 12 days, that my hematocrit comes up and a good report on the lung maturity. Of course, things can change without notice and his lungs might not be ready, but it is so wonderful to have a plan in place! We have been in limbo for 10 days now and it was getting old. God is so good!

~jerri

9/26 Update

Just a quick update and many, many thanks for all your prayers for the baby, hubby, kids and me.

I have had a little more spotting today, and am feeling a bit dizzy when I get up out of bed. The labs on my iron count show that even with three days of iron therapy via an IV drip, my numbers have not gone up. So, the plan is to do an iron therapy today (Friday), Saturday and Sunday and then re-test my blood on Monday. And, of course keeping an eye on the spotting. If my iron comes up to where they want it to be and the spotting stops for more than a few days at a time, I could go home, on very, very strict bed rest. We aren't there yet. And, things can change in the blink of an eye. So, we just continue to take one day at a time.

Baby boy is still doing well. =)

I did get permission for a 15 min. wheelchair ride per day. Woo hoo! I'll finally get to see what is outside my door! I am hoping to get my first ride when David stops by on his way home from work tonight. =)

If nothing changes through the weekend I probably will not update till Monday or Tuesday.

Oh, my *orthodontist sent lovely flowers for me, with large fragrant lilies! Isn't that so nice? David had taken two of the boys to ortho appts on Wed. and the staff had asked about me and so that is how they found out what is going on.

Happy Weekend,
jerri

* For those who don't know, I was in braces for 3 years leading up to extensive jaw surgery for TMJ.

9/24 update

Just a quick note to say things are stable. Hubby brought the kids to see me yesterday. Pardon the totally unflattering pic of me. I don't think anyone can make a hospital gown look good, especially while lying down in bed. lol. And, bed head, argh!




Thank you all for your prayers for me, baby and hubby and kids at home. This isn't easy, but God is getting us through each day. Small prayers, like having a great nurse for the day, to bigger ones like having a great perinatologist as my doctor yesterday. Several people came to visit me yesterday and that encouraged and humbled me.


Even things like getting a better bed and an egg crate mattress on top of it... a "write in" list of things that can be put on the daily menu order (for when nothing on the printed list looks any good), all have blessed me the last two days. And, all your comments and suggestions to "amuse" me bless me too!



I still don't know how long I will be here. My OB gets back from vacation tomorrow, so I hope he will call or come by and he will then be in the "loop" again and we'll start getting some of these questions answered. Until then, things staying calm, baby continuing to do well, are all wonderful. One day at a time...

Name game

A few of you commented that you'd like to help us with our "name this baby" problem. Sounds like it could be fun, and amusing. As I have already mentioned today, amusing me is very helpful, even therapeutic, during this long season of bed rest.

Yet, I wonder if you fully understand what you are getting yourselves into? You see, not only have we already used 14 boy names (first and middle names) that we COULD agree on, but we also have RULES.

Yes, we have had name rules since our first was born. Here they are:

1. First name must have more than one syllable.
2. Middle name must be a family name (someone's first or middle name from either of our families).
3. This one is more of a guideline than a true "rule": We usually use more traditional/classic type names. (this one is starting to sound like a home design show.... oh I do love to watch HGTV when I'm in the *hospital!)
4. Prefer biblical names for the first name, but again, more of a guideline, as we haven't stuck to this one each time.

You probably can't begin without knowing what names we have already used, right? So, in alphabetical order, here are the 14 boy names we have used:
Adam, Austin, Bryce, Christopher, Daniel, David, Geoffrey, Isaac, James, John, Joseph, Joshua, Patrick, Paul.

Now, lets also look at the family names that we are thinking of using as a middle name this time around, and there aren't many left, believe me!
Jesse
Emerson

The ONE first name hubby likes and seems to not want to budge from, at least right now, is Liam. To be honest, I was okay with this name several months ago. But, the longer I thought about it the more it just didn't seem to fit with rule #3. Don't get me wrong, it is a fine name, just a bit more "trendy" than we usually go with.

Here are the names I am thinking about:
Andrew (Jesse)
Jacob (Emerson)
Elijah (Jesse)

Are you totally confused yet? Do you see why this is so hard? Argh!

Oh, and while we are at it, scratch the names Dustin, Travis, Benjamin, Samuel, Ethan, Micah and Owen off this list of possible first names. Already been used amongst cousins.

If you haven't already clicked over to watch HGTV online, instead of reading all this post, and I don't blame you, and you have some name suggestions, BRING THEM ON! I mean, leave your suggestions in the comments section please.


* We don't have broadcast or cable TV at home... just use it to watch DVD's.

Seeds planted before my bed rest ...

... are now abloom, in all their glory!

click to enlarge any of these images

I just love sunflowers!

Which is your favorite pic? Number them 1-4 from top to bottom, and leave your vote in the comments section. I'll add up the votes on Saturday morning.

And, while you're at it, sign up as being one of my blog followers. I KNOW you are all out there, even if you don't comment (and that is totally okay with me), because I can see my blog counter go up and up after I put up a new post. It would be fun for me to see all of you wonderful people who grace my blog with your readership. Just click on the "follower" link in the left side bar.

31 weeks

I "celebrated" turning 31 weeks by being in the hospital, yes, once again. I went in on Saturday 9/13, with severe kidney pain, again. Only this time it was not a kidney infection, but a kidney stone. Go figure. I came home Monday afternoon 9/15.

I am very thankful that this hospital trip was for something as "easy" as a kidney stone and not because the placenta previa was bleeding.

For anyone who might be counting, not that I am of course, but this was my 5th hospital trip. Again, thankful these have all been for things not related to the previa. And, baby boy continues to be healthy and strong for which I am also very thankful.

I have an OB appt. this afternoon and hopefully there will not be any surprises. I refuse to take my hospital bag with me today. I just do. I kind of cannot handle the thought of being put back in after I just got out of there yesterday.

On a good note, I did take my fully prepared hospital bag with me when I went in on Saturday, and though I was too sick and in too much pain the first 30 hours or so, when I did start to feel better it was very nice to have clean clothes and my own toiletries with me. Yeah!

About 7 more weeks till the c-section. Still hoping and praying we get that far without any complications from the previa.

On a funny side note, hubby and I cannot agree on a name for this baby. We have never had this much struggle coming up with and agreeing on a name. But, how many people have to come up with 8 different boy names they like? When people ask me if we have a name yet, I say, yes, his name is " Baby Boy". Maybe we will be inspired on a name we can both agree on after we "see" this little boy.

**Edited to add: Just back from my OB appt. Yes, I got to come home! Hooray! My OB is wondering if my severe stomach pain is an ulcer, but there isn't any difference in treatment if we knew that for sure and so doing an upper GI really isn't going to benefit us anything and only add risks to the pregnancy. He is going to up my at home hydration to be sure I am getting enough and I am supposed to work on getting more potassium into me. Darling hubby is at the store right now buying banana's and looking for a sports drink that has potassium in it for me to see if I can drink it and have my stomach tolerate it. My kids were thrilled to see me walk back through the door after my appt. They are getting used to me ending up in the hospital anytime I leave the house. Nice surprise for them, and for me too!

30 weeks

You probably all noticed how I didn't post last week, week 29. To say it was not a great week is, well, somewhere in the ball park of being accurate. I'll try to briefly recap:

* Last Monday night my 13 y.o. son fainted in the kitchen and on his way DOWN hit his head very solidly on the edge of the kitchen island. Off to the ER with my hubby. Son had a concussion and needed 5 staples to close the hole in the back of his head. A tad stressful for all of us.

* Last Tuesday I went for my ultrasound and OB appt. Ultrasound was good, baby is good, if not great: He measured 2 weeks "ahead" on skeletal measurements and estimated at weighing 3 lbs. 6 oz. Yeah! Only a little bit of cervical change... another big yeah! BUT, my urine showed I was dehydrated again/still. So, hubby had to take me to the hospital for another round of 2000 ml's of hydration.

In the meantime, I asked my OB if I could PLEASE have in-home health care and so have my hydration done at home, so I wouldn't have to be away from my family every week for a day (my dehydration issue isn't going to go away before the baby is born it would appear - my stomach is in so much pain and I have such severe nausea if I eat AND try to drink , even with a whole slew of meds they have me on to try to combat it, that giving my stomach a break so I can be somewhat comfortable would be best, and daily hydration at home the best option of all). Home health care was set up, only in order to have daily infusion therapy the patient has to have a PICC Line put in.

* Last Friday I went in to have the PICC Line put in. It went pretty well, with only one wrong turn (in my vein that is) and only one serious bought of feeling like I was going to pass out or throw up while it was being put in. Don't want to do this again anytime soon, but if this line will last, I won't have to be poked again, even for my c-section. This line serves it all, even blood draws and IV mediation needs. Yippee! (if you could see my arm from last weeks "regular" IV, the huge bruises and the pain I had from it, you'd understand why a PICC Line is such a blessing for me)

* Last Saturday the home health care nurse came out and taught me how to start and stop and clean and everything my own infusion therapy. Yup. I have a frig full of IV bags, a little battery operated pump and tons of sterile packs of tubing and such. My infusion takes 4 hours to run, but it is totally protable, so I can go anywhere (technically speaking of course... I am still on bed rest) with it.

* Today, Tuesday the 9th, I had my weekly OB appt and FINALLY I wasn't dehydrated. Woo hoo! So, the infusion therapy is working! Yeah! I am also now in the 30th week, which means I am heading into the most dangerous time for the placenta previa. We discussed with my OB about starting steriod shots in the next could of weeks, as a preventitive measure. I asked my OB what his "gut" feeling was about my previa? He said, of course, previa's are impossible to guess at what they will do, but his "gut" feeling was that I would do okay for another couple of weeks. I'll take that, doc! So, my new goal is reaching 32 weeks without any problems...not that I have ANY control over any of this. It is just a goal.

Notice my belly bump picture? Do you see how far out my stomach is sticking? This baby is doing some serious growing lately, don't you think? I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around the fact that it is almost 10 weeks till my actual due date (though the c-section will be in about 8 weeks), with as large as I am feeling already! Yikes! God is so good though, because in the beginning of this whole previa thing one of the OB's concerns was the baby possibly not growing well. Praise God, we can scratch that concern off the list!

Thank you Jesus for your mercies each day!

28 weeks

By this week, your baby weighs nearly 2.3 pounds and may measure 14.8 inches from top to toe. At about this time, your baby can open his eyes and turn his head in utero if he notices a continuous, bright light shining from the outside. His fat layers are forming and his fingernails appear.


Another week completed...another week starting!

It is somewhat surreal to think that up to about 6 weeks ago we "thought" that I would be starting on bed rest TODAY. How quickly that all changed.

This last weekend was challanging. I started contracting again on Friday and this time the contractions didn't stop with just 24 hours of medication. They have finally stopped today, after three days of the medication and staying pretty much completely in bed (actually, my lower back hurt so much on Thursday that I spent that whole day in bed also....my contractions have started both times now the day after a low back ache starts... aha! A pattern!).

Today marks 10 weeks till we "hope" to deliver the baby... if things stay calm, no bleeding, no need to take the baby earlier because it will be safer "out" than "in". Ten more weeks of bed rest to get to that "hoped" for day. 70 days.... Okay, have to stop thinking about it that way. Every day inside me is a blessing, even if it is hard for me to be on such extended bed rest.

This is also the day/week that the real problems of this type of previa start to happen (which is why this would have been the week to "start" bed rest). Spotting, bleeding, etc. I feel like a time bomb.... ticking.... never quite knowing when (or if) it will explode. I have strict instructions from my OB that if I start spotting to go directly to the hospital. If it starts with bleeding call 911...immediately...do not delay! **gulp** See what I mean about the time bomb ticking?

On the home front, after getting a lot done on lesson plans for school the early part of last week, I hope to finish them up this week. We are planning to "start" school on Sept. 1st. All our books have finally arrived (what would I do without online ordering?). I think we have about everything we need for to get us to Thanksgiving.... though the best laid plans are great to have, there is no way to know how this will play out.

God knows and is with us today and will be there for whatever may come. We appreciate all your prayers for us!

27 weeks

It has been 7 weeks since I last posted a pic of my baby bump. Oy, lots of growing in these last 7 weeks... all over. (ahem!)

Uh, yes, I did go outside to get a pic taken, on our way to church....which I do have permission from my OB to attend, for now, as long as I stay reclining. Hubby takes our outdoor chaise for me to recline on at the back of the auditorium. I feel a bit like Cleopatra and get a fair amount of jealousy ribbing for my "lounging" at church.

Another week "gained" for our little guy. Our countdown chart says 77 days to go. We've come a ways since our 100 days began!

100 days

My 4 year old daughter asked me AGAIN this morning when are we "getting" the baby. Today? Tomorrow? She somewhat understands that I am on bed rest to help the baby grow till he is big enough to be born and be healthy (we hope and pray). Somehow she isn't grasping how very long away that day will, hopefully, be.

I tried showing her on my pocket calendar (that I keep with me while I spend my days in the recliner in my room) where today is and flipped through August, then through September, on through October and finally landing in November. "This is when we hope the baby will be born". Her eyes glazed over a bit.

I realized two things in that moment:
1. She is too young to comprehend this amount of time.
2. I was suddenly very aware of just how LONG it is going to be, and was startled by the enormity of it. My heart did a little flip. Not the kind of flip it makes when my hubby walks into the room, mind you. The kind of flip that is edging toward panic.

I decided for my daughter's benefit, and also for my own, to make a countdown chart of the days "left to go" till we expect the baby to be born (at 38 weeks a planned c-section, praying bed rest will be enough to keep the placenta from bleeding before then). I added it up. It is exactly 100 days from today. 100 days. **gulp**

No wonder the Lord tells us to take one day at a time, not worrying about tomorrow. It can be overwhelming to look ahead at all those "tomorrow's" yet to come. Not just in my situation, but in many, many situations.

My daughter will have the joy of crossing off each day as it comes, watching as the numbers go down and hopefully gaining an understanding of just how many days till the baby arrives. And, for me? I will rejoice in each day that gets crossed off, not looking at how many are left, but how many we have crossed off, each day a victory and a blessing that this little one is still inside me growing and thriving.

Ultraound results : 16 weeks

Tuesday I had an ultrasound to check on the position of the placenta. It had been over the cervix for the first 10 weeks of this pregnancy. (picture to the left is not me, in case you were wondering)

I was 16 weeks Monday, June 2nd, so seeing the baby was awesome! So completely formed and kicking and touching his/her hands to the face, even watched the mouth open and close. Amazing! Baby looks great. We did not want to know the gender and we did not find out. He/she is a feisty little person... I already knew that, as I have been feeling the baby moving for over 2 weeks already. =)

What we did find out was the placenta is now completely over the cervix. This is a complete or total placenta previa. Not only that, but the WHOLE placenta is in the "lower segment" and the cord attaches right over the cervix (which my doctor called a "centroid" previa, but I haven't been able to find anything specific to that on the web). This makes that whole are very vascular - which means lots of veins attaching in the "worst" place they could attach. (See the graphic below - I believe the type of complete/total previa I have is like the middle one shown)

Monitoring the baby and plaenta via ultrasounds and OB appts. will be done frequently. I see my OB in 3 weeks and have another ultrasound in 5 weeks.

There is a lot of information about placenta previa's diagnosed this early in pregnancy moving up and away from the cervix before delivery. However, those are mostly from marginal or low-lying previa's or complete's where the cord attaches higher than right over the top of the cervix. I am not trying to be "doom and gloom" here, just looking at the facts. However, my God is a BIG God and I know He can and will do what ever He pleases with this placenta. We are praying it will move, but also to joyfully deal with it not moving and the complications that may arise, and not worrying in the meantime.

Note how in the graphic to the left that in this illustration of a total/complete previa, the cord is inserting into the placenta fairly high up and that a good portion of the placenta is above the lower segment. So it seems there are more than one type of complete/total previa.

The probability of bleeding problems later on with this type of previa is quite high. Because of this my OB said he will probably be putting me on bed rest at 28 weeks (that is in 11.5 weeks) and if I have a bleed I will probably be put in the hospital for the part or the rest of the pregnancy.

If I can make it further without needing an emergency c-section, they will schedule a c-section for 38 weeks, two weeks before the due date, because the risk of a bad bleed gets higher and higher, especially as contractions get stronger.

Because of this type of placenta previa, with the whole placenta being in the lower segment, my OB says the incision for the c-section will be done higher than the usual "low transverse" incision. (remember the whole lower area is full of placenta, no safe place to make an incision) There is also a much greater possibility of uncontrollable bleeding after they remove the placenta because that lower part of the uterus does not contract much at all, leading to uncontrollable hemorrhaging. Because of that, there is a higher "chance" of needing a hysterectomy to stop the bleeding. Though, my OB said he would do all he could for me, to avoid a hysterectomy (and went on to say, "so if we can get you through this delivery without a hysterectomy, hopefully NEXT TIME the placenta will implant higher up." Next time. Gotta love an a Christian OB who totally supports us in having a large family and even more children!).

It is a lot to process all in one day, isn't it? I do not want to borrow trouble or think the worse or worry about this situation, but leave it all in God's hands. There is also the part where I need to be doing what I can, especially after 28 weeks, to keep this baby safe and hopefully and prayfully, avoid any bleeds or complications.

I would greatly appreciate your prayers for me, baby, hubby and the whole family as we walk through this. None of us knows what tomorrow will bring. We can only pray and cling to our Savior for wisdom, direction and comfort for each day.

I have to add that there is MUCH I am thankful for right now. Thankful that we have a living, healthy baby (many of my friends have had miscarriages this year and I have greatly grieved with them over their losses ~ I am undeserving to be blessed again with another child and do not take fertility or that pregnancy equals a baby for granted). Thankful that we got an early diagnosis so that we can be preparing now for me to go on bed rest at 28 weeks. Thankful for friends and a great church family for their support and encouragement and offers of practical help once I am on bed rest. Thankful that my youngest is old enough that I don't have to carry her, since I am not supposed to be lifting heavy things. Thankful for a great, Christian OB who supports the Quiverfull mindset and is not using scare tactics and/or chastising us for having another baby or saying I have to have a tubal after this one. Thankful that God is always on His throne, always in control and always there to comfort us.